I am frustrated! SO frustrated(this is already starting to sound like my kids!!)! I want my baby girl home, yesterday!! I want her to still be a baby when she gets home! I just want out of PGN!! Everyone around me is getting out! I know I am not supposed to compare time lines and we knew starting out that it would be a long wait! I know all of this! It is just so hard when others are getting out who went into PGN so long after us. That 5 week kick out was painful! I know it could be SO much worse and that I really have no right to complain! But today I am complaining! I am tired of PGN! I am tired of calling PGN! I am tired of calling PGN and waiting 5 minutes only to realize that no one is going to answer! I am tired of wondering if we should visit again or just wait it out to the end! And just to be real here, I am tired of people asking when we get to bring her home! WE HAVE NO IDEA!! Sorry, it's not your fault!! You are just curious, but it reminds me every time we are asked, that we have no control over her coming home. Only God knows when this will happen! Once again, we have to keep the faith that God will bring her home in His perfect timing! I have to keep talking myself back to this point so that I stay sane!! My timing is NOT perfect!!! I am human!! This was all God's plan and He will take care of this! Let go and let God!! Hopefully tomorrow I will actually live by that statement!
On a happier note, I had a sample of Starbuck's Guatemalan coffee tonight at Target. I absolutely love the coffee in Guatemala, and tonight I got to sip the coffee and think of the beautiful country! Another great thing at Target, besides the Starbuck's, is the Global Bazaar! I look forward to it every year! It is fun just to look! Thanks, little sister, for picking me up and taking me to one of my favorite places! It was the highlight of my day!!
Monday, January 14, 2008
Keeping It Real
Posted by The gFamily at 11:25 PM
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
14 comments:
I am right with you. FRUSTRATED is putting it mildly. I am also in PGN and hold on each day hoping to hear we are out. I too know that my little Gabriella is in God's hands and I am not worried about her well being - it's our two governments whose hands I don't put my faith in.
I was thrilled to find our blog file this evening. I've always loved watching your pictures of Gillian - she is just the cutest!
--Tracey waiting on Gabriella
That, right there, is the second most frustrating thing about this process. The first being unnecessary speculation. We are all human, Gillian so don't beat yourself up for turning into the green-eyed-monster. Been there, done that!! We are all but stumbling warriors of faith. You will get a turn, I promise. He has promised. And He is always good on His promises. She will come home and that is all that really matters, right? Pray about this: does it REALLY matter to His heart that she come home in February or in April, May or June? Or does it matter that she DOES come home. God will answer you. How do I know? I prayed the same thing and I bet your answer is the same is mine :O) I'm standing in the gap for and with you....Trish
You let it out, honey! I'm glad you are "keeping it real" because you need that release. You have been such a rock through this process, but it's okay to be a soft, squishy human, too. :) (No, you're not squishy, but it's the opposite of a hard rock.) HA HA!
So today is a new day, and God will give you strength for today. Here's what Joyce Meyer says in her book, "Today we may wake up with the same problems we had when we went to bed, problems that yesterday we felt we just couldn't take anymore. But somehow today, after proper rest and sleep, we think, I can do it; I can face it again. God promises to renew our strength when we rest in Him."
I'll be around this morning if you want to give me a call to chat. I'm here for you, okay?
Much love,
Joanna
Oh Gretchen......my heart hurts for you. I know my process went abnormally fast for typical Guat. timelines, but I still know how badly you want your baby with you. I am PRAYING, PRAYING for you and crazy PGN to let you OUT!
I love this verse...."DO NOT BE AFRAID, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. I will say the north, 'Give them up!' and to the south, 'Do not hold them back.' Bring my sons from afar and my daughters from the ends of the earth--" (Isaiah 43:5 & 6). I was reading this verse a few months ago and God revealed to me the part that says do not be afraid....I had read this passage many times before and had never paid attention to that command. What an important detail to the passage about our children coming from afar. I'll call you later today.
Love you,
Jenny
calcrew.wordpress.com
Do you want me to start sending PGN hate mail? Where are they located? Maybe we could T.P. them!! :) You have every right to be frustrated. Most of the great men and women in the Bible spent at least a portion of their time frustrated with God and His timing. Hang in there!!! She's worth all of this! And for goodness sakes, go see her again if you want to! It's just money - who cares! :) I'll keep praying!!
I am reminded of what dave rod said on sunday about abraham and sarah. oh, the patience we need to have to wait on God's perfect timing. Hang in there!
Never feel bad about being exhausted with this process. No matter what the timelines, or story it is hard on everyone, and we all need to support one another in the process.
So, have your time to wollow, then you will get back up, and find the strength to go on.
Your family is adorable.
Way to let your feelings out, have you been reading that book I bought for your kids? :)
I can totally relate! When we were in PGN I got so frustrated when I just kept getting asked "now, what is the date your son will be home"- DUH- if I had it- believe me- I'd be shouting it from the mountain tops!
I know how you feel. PGN is so difficult to make it through. But, I will tell you, once you get there- and you are OUT- it is the greatest feeling... your time is coming!! :-)
Emily
Oh Gretchen, I feel your pain and I really wish it wasn't real!! This is so hard. I admit, it is very hard to see others coming and going as we continue to wait. It's just not fair! I wish I could offer words of encouragement, but I need them myself! I guess we can at least wail together! :)
Just a little strength passed on to you. I am positive right now, but am sure to need a pick me up in the future. We want Gillian home, too!
Oh, I forgot to mention that I also LOVE Guatemalan coffee!!! YUM!! I am trying hard to focus on all the things I love about this process...coffee is a start, right?? :)
The only thing that gets me through these unpredictalbe days is my faith. I know that God will see us through this very difficult part of the process. I also know that he has given us each other to hold each other up in prayer. I'll add you and your family to my prayer list.
Pam L waiting for Nola
hey...you're welcome!:) We keep that Target in business...or at least we keep them open until they absolutely have to close!;)
Post a Comment